If you’d like a 3-minute mini-meditation available to use when you’re distressed, upset, emotionally off balance , here it is. It’s almost as simple as a meditation gets, because that’s about all a person can handle when they’re in an emotional meltdown. When you’re really flustered, a basic railing to grab onto is what you need, because you probably can’t focus on much more than that.
If you’re with someone else who’s freaking out and you want to help, you can talk them through this same process described just below. Speak out loud, almost verbatim as written below, making whatever tweaks fit the situation. Make sure your tone of voice is calm and soothing, It might or might not be appropriate to hold the person’s hand to help ground them. You can check that out by touching their hand lightly and seeing whether they take hold of it. Respect that message.
No frills. So this is for you when you’re upset. Or for you to use to help someone else when they’re upset. If you’re a helping another person at a fire, an accident, a crime scene, or any other crisis situation –or even a situation that’s an emotional crisis even if someone else wouldn’t think the situation itself is a crisis–this can prove useful.
STEP ONE
If you can, sit up straight. If not, sit or lie however you need to.
Notice your breathing. If it’s slow, that’s fine. If its fast and shallow, slow it down. At least a little slower and deeper.
STEP TWO
Now, as you inhale, count the number “1.” Hear it in your ears if you can. If your eyes are closed, try to visualize i|T.
As you exhale, notice everything you’re seeing and hearing in your mind, and let it all flow away on your outgoing breath as completely as you can
Now as you inhale again, count the number “2.” Concentrate on ‘hearing’ or visualizing that number as fully as possible. If you can’t do either, just ‘think it.
As you exhale, again notice what’s filling your mind, and again let it flow and blow away, so that when you’ve exhaled completely your mind is as empty as possible.
STEP THREE
As you inhale again, mentally count the number “3.” When you’ve inhaled completely, take an instant to notice
anywhere your body feels tense and tight.
As you exhale, let yourself release and let go of that tension at the same time that you’re letting go of any ideas that
have formed in your mind.
STEP FOUR
For your next seven breaths, do just as you did with number 3. With each breath, change the number to the next higher one (this helps keep your focus on what you’re doing rather than letting your mind run away to think about whatever was disturbing you). On the incoming breath, silently recite the number and notice whatever else is coming through your mind—or even spinning around in it. Then on the outgoing breath, focus your attention on noticing any physical tension or tightness anywhere in your muscles and letting go of it—while at the same time letting go of whatever other words or sentences or imagery are coming through your mind. You’re letting go of words, letting go of imagery, letting go of muscular tension and tightness. It’s like that old song —all those thoughts and imagery and muscular tensions that are bothering you are singing “Please release me, let me go!” to you.
If you’re guiding another person through this process, verbally walk them through breaths 4 through 10 just as you did with breath 3.
After just these 10 slow breaths you’ll probably find that you feel much better than you did—even though this may take you only 3 or 4 minutes. If you (or the person you’re helping) are still quite upset, then use the process again with the next 10 breaths, using the releasing physical tension process you began with breath 3 in all ten breaths.
The key insight with this process is that the mind-body connection works in both directions. When you’re upset, you tense up your body—automatically. To become less upset, as you relax your body consciously, in turn it relaxes your mind.
© 2021 by Victor Daniels.
You’re welcome to share this with whomever you wish so long as no charge or profit is made from doing so. Inclusion in any electronic or hardcopy post or document for which a charge is made requires consent of the author.